Obituary of Toothless Millard

Toothless, you were petty from the start. You turned all of us into your biped servants, and we "willingly" obliged. You made us think you were a boy, only to find out after a costly visit to the vet that you were indeed a girl... Petty AF, I tell ya. But while you weren't with us for long, you became one of the most loved members of our family. Your constant "side-eye" coupled with your persistent death glare reminded us that at any moment, you could end us all and call us crazy, but we loved that about you. We will miss your constant need to attack anything that challenged your authority and your snuggles while we relaxed or played video games. But most of all, we will miss your gaslighting. Because boy, did you have us good. Watching trashy reality tv and true crime docs will never be the same without you. Wherever you are, we know you are looking down and judging every single one of us, as you should be.  
We love you Toothless, always and forever.
 Your Bipeds and Feline Adversaries